Christian Dating : How to Navigate Proposals as a Young lady (Part 1)

 

First love (Premiere 'pyaar').

"how much does a 15years old girl knows about love?”

“Come”

"Wa"

"Zo"

"Ve"

“Bia”

 

 "Please come Oh?", Jessica beckoned to her friends from across the senior block hall . She was on her way to the bukateria, when she sighted them. In their usual gossip manner their mouths were glued to each others' ear, more than normal.

Yes! Another sweet gossip in the air. Jessica could tell from their lively voices and fast roving eyes. But this time, hers would be sweeter because she was ready to tell them - how she had found love, what love was to her and how being in love felt like.

"Trust, there is a new thing on ground", Hadassah smiled and waved to Jessica. Among Jessica's friends, only Hadassah could question her moves and authority. The rest would always feel and act like Jessica should and could lord over them.

"Please come Oh, dear friends", she cried as she watched them skipped some meters to catch the gist.

"What is it, Jessica?", Hadassah asked excitedly.

"I have fallen in love", Jessica's face beamed with pure delight.

“I guessed it is your first, who is he?”, Hadassah coyly smiled.

 ***

Jessica and several others were beginning to get bored in class. Some did the mind-travel, while Jessica scribbled the above sentence in her old biology notebook as the lesson wore on. Mr Ajibs, the subject teacher was actually sweating out his strength to discuss a new topic that the students had termed to be 'boring'. He had even read the disinterest from their demeanor, the minute he rolled out their sixth week topic and ever since much enthusiasm about the topic were not glaring. Even from his brilliant students, there were little or no flow. He could see this.

Well, who cared?

No one. Not even him, because this topic...he must handle it well. He could sense that the SS2 class students, mostly enjoy the practical aspects of biology than the theoretical aspects. Yet, he still taught...while they watched on morosely. The few that didn't watch like that, played with their friends and mentally pulled away from the class.

 And, Jessica was part of them as she busied herself , scribbling in different shades and letter-size of the sentence- 'love is a beautiful thing'

Dans Akin was the SS3 student that had caught Jessica's fancy. To say that he had charmed Jessica was an understatement. Who would believe, especially among her friends that Jessica could be cowered by the light feathers of love? Jessica was that strong and unbendable, that most boys in her class had placed bets on and yet they 'lost'.

Jessica was the modern church girl cum introvert of her class. Yet, her absence was always felt.

How well would they hold on?

All through the last phases in High school, Dans Akin and Jessica Thompson peacefully and purely maintained their budding and bubbling relationship. Till Jessica got admission  to  study  English  and  literary studies in a prestigious university. She had eyes, always and more for Dans Akin alone.

When Dans Akin also left for school, he struggled against all odds, never to let her down.

Yes. He did struggled to maintain it, because Jessica would not give him what he craved for - kiss, cuddles, romance (gestures and hugs), sex. She would have none of such, because she would not want to perceive the 'aroma' of a 'food' that she wouldn't eat.

All through their undergraduate days.....they stayed off double dating.

Each tells the contemporaries, "I am in a serious relationship and I am in love"

“Interesting!” Their friends would jeer back. “Let's see how far you will go with this”.

Well, Jessica graduated first and went for youth service. Again, it was only Dans Akin.

'Why is it only him?' Responsible guys would ask.

Yes! Guys of marriageable age and financially rooted.

Marks: A marketer at one of the leading commercial banks. She had to frequent the bank, most days in the week, due to the nature of her job. He inadvertently became her stalker at the bank halls and at her lodge, her 'cctv' when she was with her fellow NYSC members. 

Quite admirable and responsible. He was beginning to be advanced age-wise, Grey hairs had began to pop often at the edges and crown of his hair lines. But he was smart and jovial. One of the most smartest man she had ever met.

"Even if I agree.....you would look like my father and nothing like a fiancé to me", Jessica had once squealed when he planned to see her father in the city of Lagos.

"I don't see things that way. Love overlooks, Jessica", he would keep on reiterating. "You never can tell, if that was why God kept me unmarried all these years, I am in my 40s. When you walked into the marketing segment of the bank that humid blessed Wednesday, I knew my cloak of singleness was to be done away with"

"Arrgh", Jessica had heaved. "I'm in a serious relationship already. And he loves me."

Philip: A rich Port-Harcourt guy who is ready to travel to Casablanca with her. This one had been on her neck since orientation days in NYSC camp. He was damn so serious about her. "No dating, no waiting...only pray about it and give me a chance to love and marry you when God consents", in the words of Philip, that was what he staged as his anthem each time they crossed path on their way to the parade ground, every day.

"Philip, can't you get it? I am stuck in love with my man. He is going to see my parents soon".

Leaving the camp after 21 days gave her a breather. Like an answered prayer! She found an escape route. Yet, he tailed on..

Victor: A young man based in Dubai, ready to start and conclude all the marriage preparations, then fly her with him. Victor was her churchy type. The shy one that had taken a whooping four months to propose to her. With the warm feeling of his admiration bubbling in her belly, she turned down his proposal.

"On what grounds, Jessica? You know I really love you loads".

"On the ground that I am in love already, hope you get it", she had gently replied as she listened to his voice fade away over the phone that sunny morning. It was their last conversation. The very last one before he boarded the flight to UAE...

 

Asher: Her fellow corp member during the NYSC was the club kind of guy that had actually 'tasted' different girls but was willing and ready to settle with her. He was the same person who publicly proposed in the middle of a road. He wanted her so bad that he had to give up his circle of friends to be with her.

More and more came, those that besieged her lodge in the view to see her and start off with being friends.

The church brothers that had playfully , but with an underlining tone in their expression, ‘threatened’ to walk her down the aisle. Well, being courageous would be their medicine, because 'Marriage Committee' in her church is not a small something...

Those that demonstrated the power of God's Spirit in their lives...

Those that boldly recognized her value and virtues, earnestly praying for her kind.

What about her most revered 'spiritual father'? Mr. Emmanuel of her campus days.

                                          Mr. Emmanuel- The spiritual pappy

On the breezing feels of festivities - early December, still on her NYSC year. He had deemed it fit after months of pure assurance and with a faith-soaked mouth, he shattered her office with his enrapturing proposal.

That Day...

The burning desire of seeing God sanctioning her relationship with Dans Akin, disturbed her. Dans Akins’s image and her pre-planned future with him danced before her eyes. The weight of the solemn truth that she never gave God a whooping chance to confirm her first relationship burdened her.

The barrage of many worthy proposals turned down made her eyes crawled glassy.

Mr. Emmanuel’s proposal shook her world…..to the very core.

And in the glistening walls of her inner eyes.   Love begins to frown.